I’m Afraid of My Next Steps

I have some big obstacles ahead of me. Obstacles that I’ve put off for months and years. Things I’ve avoided out of fear, worry, and the unknown. Things that I don’t want to face, but it’s important that I do.

Fear plays a major role in everyone’s life. There are situations, people, and actions we avoid both knowingly and unknowingly. Here are some of the things that most scare me currently:


One of my biggest fears for the past 3 years has been the fear of driving. It took me over a year before I finally got my driver’s permit and in the year and a half since then, I’ve only driven a handful of times. I dread the experience.

Just the mere thought of driving brings up a list of doubts. Am I capable of driving accident-free? If something does happen, will I be able to handle the consequences? Will I start to sweat and shake every time I get behind the wheel? These worries pull at me every time I think about driving.

I can see the freedom of having a full license and being comfortable enough to go places on my own. A few times each month, something will come up and I will wish I was comfortable driving. Unfortunately, being able to see the rewards at the end hasn’t motivated me enough to start driving consistently. It’s something I don’t want to face but know I need to.

Learning to Market Articles

I’ve been writing for over 4 months now. I have a lot of fun writing these articles and I make sure to edit each article before it’s published. I’m proud of where my writing is at the moment. It’s a lot better than it was when I started and it will only continue to get better as I write. My biggest flaw in terms of being a writer, as I see it, is my fear of marketing articles.

Up to this point, I have done very little marketing for my writing. I do the writing, submit to a medium publication or post it on my personal blog, and hope for people to see it. I’ve managed to have a little success through these methods, but I know there is far greater potential for each article if I started to market them consistently.

Part of my apprehension for marketing articles is remaining anonymous. When I write without marketing my writing, it is only strangers that read the article. I don’t have to show my friends or family what I really think. I don’t have to risk any possible disagreement that might occur with others that have different views. It is easier for me to express my views to people that I don’t know and will probably never meet. There is less conflict there. Strangers are much less likely to start an argument over beliefs because they are less interested in the other person. Becoming more connected with the people that read my articles scares me, but I know that it’s the only way to create the impact and connection I hope to have.

I believe I would enjoy this increased connection and participation, but taking the first few steps is scary.

Looking Toward the Future

As a college student nearing the end of my Sophomore year, looking toward the future is scary. There are a lot of question marks in the next 5 years. I’m halfway through a math degree. I have no idea what I want to do with that degree yet. I’ve also had ideas of following my writing. I haven’t decided if I’m going to do one instead of the other, or if I’m going to do my best to continue both.

I’m admittedly afraid to look toward graduation when I have to make that decision. Soon, I will have to start looking at internship and career options, but it is much easier to avoid those responsibilities until they become necessities. Procrastination is a dangerous trap, but it sounds tempting in times like this.

These next few weeks, I’m going to have to do some hard thinking about how I want to spend my time. I intend on continuing both for a while, but I may have to make adjustments to how I allocate my time. The responsibility scares me but it’s one I cannot avoid.

In Conclusion

Life is filled with fear. For all the amazing joys we get to experience, we will have our fair share of fears. Learning to manage and work through these fears is as important a skill as any. Each of the things listed above is a fear that has created an obstacle in my path. Overcoming these obstacles will be a huge milestone in my personal growth.

You likely have your own fears and worries. What are they? What steps can you take in the coming days to move a little in that direction?

2 thoughts on “I’m Afraid of My Next Steps

  1. Taking the first step is always the hardest. Seems like the writing is off to a good start though, this article looks great! Best of luck and just take things one step at a time. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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